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Alan Hansen


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Alan Hansen's tactical view

"It's a long time since I've seen Manchester United pass so badly

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Heskey's an England hitman

... cannot make it into the team but also cannot even make it into the squad. There are those of us — Alan Hansen included — who firmly believe Owen will eventually make his way back. But, for the moment, Fabio Capello’s faith in Heskey has been wonderfully rewarded. After a first half in which England had struggled, despite taking an 11th-minute lead through Steven Gerrard, Heskey finally...

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Is that enough composure Mr Hansen'........

Talk about putting your foot in your mouth! But then again Mr Hansen is good at that. At half-time, "expert" BBC pundit Alan Hansen declared that Theo Walcott had no composure. I sure Theo's goal may help to change your mind Mr Hansen! It was very Thierry Henry, which translates "Composure at its very best" Keep it Goonerish......................

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Gary Lineker's wife-to-be Danielle Bux can't stand football

... the Lineker family's football obsession tedious.She told Maxim magazine: "We often go out with Alan Hansen and Mark Lawrenson when they are filming Match Of The Day up North but you wouldn't have to guess what they talk about all night."Gorgeous Danielle, who models the La Senza lingerie range, used to date Kelly Brooks' new boyfriend England rugby star Danny Cipriani.She and former...

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Even big Premier League clubs face relegation

Even big Premier League clubs face relegationFor any manager of an established Premier League club, the statistics which show that two out of every three, sometimes three out of every three, promoted teams go straight back down, should give hope. By Alan Hansen Last Updated: 1:24AM BST 06 Oct 2008 Keeping his head: Martin O'Neill knows the gap between his club and Chelsea is still enormous...

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Common sense anyone?

The F.A. have announced that lucky punters will be able to buy common sense by the bag from their headquarters as of this Saturday, after they have decided no one in the football world has any use for it any more. With the backdrop of multi-billionaire takeovers, Djibril Cisse’s haircuts and Alan Hansen’s “technical analysis”, the [...]

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Bill Gates to Buy Everton

Liverpool fans will be shitting themselves as news reaches TheSpoof.com that the world's second richest man, Bill Gates, intends to purchase Everton F.C. for a cool £450.World-class Everton players like Neville Southall, Gary Lineker and - er - the late Alan Ball will become nothing more than historical figures when Mr. Gates - who wears spectacles - starts downloading world-class "soccer" players...

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Common sense anyone?

The F.A. have announced that lucky punters will be able to buy common sense by the bag from their headquarters as of this Saturday, after they have decided no one in the football world has any use for it any more.With the backdrop of multi-billionaire takeovers, Djibril Cisse’s haircuts and Alan Hansen’s “technical analysis”, the football world has recently become steadily madder, with...

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FIFA 09 [Review]

... to their positioning as they hold onto a marked opponent and stop opening up gaps that would have Alan Hansen spitting in fury. It's a marked improvement over previous FIFA titles and, in defence particularly, there's an argument to be said that it could be better than PES this year. From a defending point of view we'd say EA have managed to set a new milestone in the footie genre.Movement...

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BBC Sack Mark Lawrenson For Rubbish Predictions

... make better predictions than the ex-Liverpool defender.Lawrenson's former Anfield team-mate, Alan Hansen"Mark couldn't predict the winner in a Man Utd/Bury match, let alone the weekly Premiership matches. He's useless!"The last straw came this week as Lawro predicted that Liverpool would beat Everton 6-4 in the Merseyside derby at the weekend.A BBC spokesman said:"It was time for...

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Steven Gerrard's keen on £20m man

... the goals will come from Keane to answer the “£20million for working hard'” jibe from TV pundit Alan Hansen. Torres’s clinically taken brace might have been the highlight of Liverpool’s best performance so far but their captain fantastic reckons Keane deserved equal-top billing. “I know that Nando was class and showed how deadly he can be, but I still believe that Robbie was an equally...

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Liverpool News: Anfield legend hosts golf tournament to help support cancer charity

LIVERPOOL legend Alan Hansen has hosted a charity golf event at a Southport club.

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Can Liverpool finally have their cake and eat it the Manchester United, Arsenal, Chelsea and Blackburn way?

Ian Rush, Kenny Dalglish and Alan Hansen – just three of the names associated with Liverpool’s heydays of league titles and European Cups. Today’s counterparts – Fernando Torres, Ryan Babel and Jamie Carragher – certainly have the talent to go down in history alongside those famous names but once these three and their team-mates have long retired and become resigned to Liverpool FC’s...

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Ballet features football beauty

... premiere of The Beautiful Game at the Playhouse last night was attended by ex-Liverpool players Alan Hansen and John Barnes, and former England goalkeeper Gordon Banks.The 12-minute show was choreographed to a mix of Nessun Dorma, Elvis Presley’s A Little Less Conversation and You’ll Never Walk Alone.Barnes said: “Look at the footwork and co-ordination - it can be very effective.“He...

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Arsenal unearth yet another DIAMOND!

... the manager is at harnessing his youthful protégés into the polished young talents they now are.Alan Hansen famously said you can’t win anything with kids and was of course proved wrong by Fergie’s fledglings. What price now that Wenger’s wonder boys could well prove the Liverpool legend wrong for a second time?